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A Rush of blood to the Head CH 1Lucy finds her husband’s new coworker interesting. And a affair Begins “Lucy!”I sighed and ripped off my sunglasses. “Yeah?”Mark was still in his suit when he marched out. He’d loosened his tie on his way home from work. An obvious sign of stress from him.”Why the fuck aren’t you getting ready?”My fingers skimmed down my slick collarbone. Mark traced the movement with his eyes, but he wouldn’t be distracted. He glared, waiting for my response.”Ready for what?”He groaned. “The dinner, Lucy. The dinner I’ve talked about all fucking week.”I slid my sunglasses back on. “I told you to come up with some excuse for me. Tell them I have a migraine or whatever.””So help me God, if you aren’t up and in the shower in one minute I will lose my shit.””Ooo,” I mocked. “These dinners are horrible. The men are dull as fuck and I hate their wives.”Mark grinned and walked over to stroke my hair. “Yeah, yeah. They hate you, too. How can they not, when you look like you do?”I brought his hand down and nibbled on his fingers. “Careful. You’re about to pay me a compliment.”His other hand went to his fly.My eyebrows lifted. “What about dinner?””We can be late.”A few seconds later his cock popped out–shiny and amber-colored, thanks to my sunglasses. I palmed it. How odd I still found cocks, even after all these years, even after all the sticky fumbling in the back of used Toyotas. They were just hard cylinders with bulging veins. Ugly, really. But I loved them all the same. I loved running my hands over them, jacking them off until they emitted my prize. It was the ultimate pat on the shoulder. If they came on my chest, I’d think with a smirk that it was my badge of honor.Mark grew impatient and pulled my hair. “Give me head.””We’re going to be late.”He laughed. “A blow job is reason enough to miss appetizers.””The way I blow you, you’ll be lucky enough to make it to coffee.”He pressed his cock to my lips. “All this talk. Swallow my cock, Lucy.”I licked the sides of his cock first. It made me laugh to see how his face changed, how in this minuscule way I held such startling power. His eyebrows scrunched down, his mouth dropped open, his hands fisted. How miraculous my mouth could be to a man, just by using my tongue.I flattened my tongue against his head. My hands lifted, grasping his heavy balls.”Fuuuuck,” he moaned.I sucked him in, contracting the inside of my cheeks around him. His hands tightened in my hair when he felt the velvet of my cheeks rubbing against his hardness.”Been thinking about this all day.””Really?” I asked, pulling away. “I thought you’d been thinking of dinner all day.”He became impatient and fisted my hair. “Open up that smart mouth.”I did as he asked. The blow job was sloppy. Saliva ran down my cheek, finding its home down inside my cleavage. He eventually became wild and impatient, fucking my mouth. His hands squeezed my tits, caressed my head, pet my cheek.”I’m gonna come,” he eventually grunted.I swallowed all of him down and wiped my mouth. He loved it when I drank his cum with one swallow.Mark zipped up his pants, tucked in his shirt. He even straightened his tie. “You have fifteen minutes to fix yourself up.”____I emerged closer to a half hour later. My dress was salmon-colored, and honestly was too scant for a business diner. Mark barely reacted when I rushed downstairs, however, so I assumed it wasn’t a big issue.The drive over was silent. A valet stood outside Nick’s house. Mark flicked a twenty at the valet and ushered me inside, an insistent hand at my lower back.The first time I met Nick and his wife, she made a forever impression on me. He was about 5’6; Denise neared 6 feet. Her hair was bleach blonde and she was far too skinny to be considered healthy. She only ever wore blue, and she did not disappoint this night. Her dress was a clinging silk, sparkling near the bust. She was at least a decade older than me, but when she spoke she sounded as though she were three decades younger.Her hands were even fucking gloved when they accepted mine. “Lucy,” she smiled. “So glad you could make it.'”How are you, Denise?”We chitchatted about nothing for a few minutes. The other women waved hello as enthusiastically as their acting skills would permit. The truth of the matter was that the other ladies, as plastic and boring they might have been, outclassed me. They came from wealthy families, bosses or business partners. My father was a plumber and my mother was a teacher. I didn’t see them much anymore.I caught a few of the men giving me blatant appraisals. I smiled at a few of them, basking in the attention. Plus, if it pissed off a few of the Barbies it was worth it.”Have you met Luke yet?” Denise asked with a naughty grin.I grabbed a flute of champagne off a server’s tray. “Luke?”One of the other wives–Patricia–moved closer to us. “You haven’t met Luke yet? Oh, you’re going to die.”I rolled my eyes. They were acting the same way they did when David joined the firm. The ladies went crazy over him until they found out he was gay. He was handsome, intelligent, sarcastic and belligerent. And my best friend.He came to these functions less and less, however, and more often than not I was left to fend for myself. I looked around hopefully, hoping to spot him. Patricia laughed and assumed I was trying to find Luke.”He’s not here yet.” When I gave her a look, she mouthed, “Luke.””Well, is David coming tonight?”Denise finished off her glass of champagne. “He’s inside, somewhere. And Luke will be here in time for dinner. Patricia has a bit of a crush–“”We all have a bit of a crush,” Patricia interjected, her cheeks red. “Don’t pretend he hasn’t entered your fantasies, too.”Ew. I repressed a shudder and shot Mark a glare. He tipped his glass at me. It didn’t seem fair that I be subjected to these women when he got to stand with his legs spread, a nice cigar in hand, and talk about whatever he pleased.”Wait until you see him, Lucy. Seriously–he’s a killer,” Denise giggled.Patricia looked me over. “Mark didn’t say anything about him?”I was tired of hearing about some guy who was going to end up being a carbon copy of most of the men here, even if he was hot.I opened my mouth, intent on saying so, when I felt a tap on my shoulder. David was behind me, looking as dapper as ever. I gave him a big hug– a rarity for me.”Thank God you’re here,” I whispered in his ear.”Well, we’re going inside to check on the food. See you in a bit,” Denise said, dragging Patricia behind her.David watched them run inside with a smile. “They’re off to talk about us.”The girls never entirely bought that David was gay when they saw what good friends we became, and how David rarely spared them a “hello”. They became convinced we were having an affair.”Ugh, I’m so sick of them already tonight. They keep going on and on about Luke. Speaking of which, how come you haven’t mentioned this new guy to me? You’ve never spared me the details when a sexy guy enters your orbit.”David’s smile faded and he rolled his eyes. “That’s because I don’t find him sexy. He’s a prude, really.””How so?””You’ll see what I mean.” Then David smiled and pinched my stomach. “What’s new with you, baby? Has Mark persuaded you to let him knock you up yet?”I shuddered. “No. I haven’t stopped taking the pill, either.”For the past year, Mark dropped hints he wanted to start a family. Most of the other lawyers in the firm had c***dren already, and Mark refused to be outdone. I managed to talk him into waiting, but with every day he became increasingly impatient. And Mark always got his way.David glanced at Mark with raised eyebrows. “Does he know that?””Hell, no. He’d flip a shit.””You gotta have k**s sometime. It’s in the rulebook of domesticity.”I took his arm and walked with him inside. “Is taking another guy’s cock up your ass in the rulebook, too?”David threw his head back laughing. “Not quite, you little bitch.”Of course Denise had a seating arrangement. I looked around for my name on one of her exquisite plates. She sat me next to Laura, the resident d**ggie. She was always beyond stoned. The other women sometimes bummed Xanax off of her. I stayed away, never finding people who I couldn’t have an intelligent conversation with of use to me.”Looks like we’re as far away from one another as possible,” David sighed.”You’ll come over and talk to me later, right?”He kissed my hand. “You know it.”I sat down, threw my napkin over my lap and rubbed my temples. It was going to be a long night. I flicked my gaze over to the name card on the plate next to me and shook my head. I was seated next to the famous Luke, who was late. That meant everyone would be watching him–and by extension, me.Then the girls’ giggles grew in volume and I knew he’d arrived. He wandered into the room and a great silence fell.Truth be told, I’d expected a blonde and blue-eyed guy with ruddy cheeks and a boy-next-door, innocent kind of aura.But he was a tall man with a sharp nose, a grim mouth and eyes as black as night. The light shone against them, making their glow appear cruel and alien. They were fathomless as they swept across the room, touching on each face with the barest amount of reaction.Nick stepped forward and shook his hand. “Luke, thanks for coming, buddy!”I felt like I was in some lame movie set in the ’50’s with terrible acting and models desperately trying to become actresses.The girls sat down, buzzing with anticipation as Nick brought Luke around, introducing or reintroducing him to his guests. Everyone made a spectacle of themselves, even the men. I heard someone whisper that his father was an incredibly powerful judge. That was probably a big reason why Luke seemed like Jesus to everyone, and helped me understand why they were all awed by him. His demeanor, however, was enough to intimidate me.I was last on the introduction round. Nick gestured towards me with a smile. “And here is Mark’s wife, Lucy. She’s a good friend.”Luke looked me over and seated himself without a word. Nick clapped his hands together, hiding his discomfort with enthusiasm. That out-of-body movie set vibe came back to me.”Awesome, introductions made. Let’s get to dinner. Everybody, get your glasses filled up!”After a few minutes when it became clear Luke wasn’t going to strike up a conversation, I turned to him and plastered on my best smile. I was curious; sue me. “How do you like the firm?”His eyes didn’t waver from the steak in front of him. “Fine.””You’re getting along with everyone? Because I know Mark can be–“”Everyone is fine.”My smile grew. “You really are a lawyer. You reek of evasiveness and artificial politeness.”He finally shifted in his seat and paid me attention. “You don’t sound particularly fond of lawyers. Interesting considering your husband is one of the best.”I was about to say something else but I was interrupted by Patricia, whose eyes were shooting daggers at me even though her lips were tipped up in a botoxed smile.”So, Lucy. Mark tells me you guys are trying to have a baby. It’s about time. You can join the Mommy Club.” She grinned over at Denise, who was attempting to hide her snicker behind her napkin. “I think you’re the only couple left who hasn’t had a k** by now.”Mark laughed. “Don’t worry. Lucy can never stand not fitting in for long.”Some of the men chuckled. Patricia’s husband Bruce gave me an appreciative once-over. “Like it would be some hardship for you, Mark.”Yuck.”As much as I love flattering Lucy,” batman escort David cut in, “I’d much rather gossip about the McDermott case.” I gave him a grateful smile.This effectively changed the subject, though I still felt Luke watching me. He leant closer to my ear. “Do they always talk like this?””Pretty much.” When he looked disappointed, I put down my knife and fork. “I hope you weren’t expecting an intelligent discourse on politics or something. Because that doesn’t happen here. They talk shop, or they pit each other’s wives against each other.””Lucky for me I don’t have a wife, then.” He noticed my wine glass was nearly empty and poured me some more. “Your husband talks about you a lot.””Really?” I was legitimately astonished. Mark wasn’t a gushy kind of guy. I couldn’t imagine what he’d have to say about me. “What does he say?”His lips curved in a smile. I finally understood why the other ladies were attracted to him. Charismatic, quiet, tall, dark… and he had a wonderful smile. I sensed an undercurrent to him, though, something thirsty and scheming.”Mostly he complains about you, but it seems like it’s in an affectionate way.””How kind of you. You’re actually trying to make him sound good.” I sipped my wine. “No need to sell me on him. We’re already stuck with each other for life.”He laughed. “God, you guys really are like fodder for those real housewives TV shows. I thought Nick was k**ding.””Nick glamorizes us. If you want the truth, go to Mark. He’ll just say we’re miserable bitches that no one would want to watch, which is mostly true. We’re boring.”Luke cut into his steak, smiling. “If you say so.””Are you guys badmouthing me?” Mark called out.Everyone laughed. This was an old joke; Mark said it often at parties, dinners, etc. Usually it meant I was embarrassing him in some way. I supposed I was paying too much attention to Luke.I gave him a smile. “Of course.””Don’t believe her, Luke. She’s on medication.”Everyone tittered, sharing knowing glances. We were all on medication of some sort. That was the joke, really.Luke didn’t get it. I could tell he thought it was odd, this baiting, aggressive way we had amongst ourselves. I understood what David meant, though I wouldn’t sum it up as Luke being prudish. More like he was just a nice guy. Whatever that was.Nick took over the table’s conversation. The topic did turn political, but the men screamed over each other, calling this guy a commie or that guy a bleeding heart. It turned tedious.Denise eventually gave Nick a kiss on the cheek, stood with a great flourish and announced she was headed to the kitchen. Patricia and the other ladies stood. I knew I had to get up and it sucked. Denise would probably talk about how her youngest baby was killing her nipples, or Patricia would complain about how Bruce looked at the babysitter.Before I stood, Luke touched my arm. “Is it really always like this?”I gave him a rueful smile. “Unfortunately.””At least you’re here,” he said. It sounded more like a relieved confession than a come-on.I sensed David’s eyes on me. He seemed amused, the prick.”I’m not great company. I’m probably the worst here.”He didn’t have a chance to answer. Patricia took one of my arms, Denise held on to the other.”Girl talk, Luke. You wouldn’t be interested,” Denise giggled.The girls brought me to the kitchen and, as expected, let go of me as soon as they possibly could. They formed a little circle with a few of the other wives– vapid, trophy brides that thrived on gossip and prescription meds. They loved to remind me I wasn’t like them. It didn’t bother me.I drifted off and went to Nick’s study. I knew he wouldn’t mind; I typically went through his study and read his books, left him nasty notes in his drawers. Denise hated that I was allowed in there.I was admiring his new desk when I heard someone clear their throat. Luke stood in the doorway, watching me.”Are you supposed to be in here?””Are you?” I parried back. “I thought it was sacrilege to leave Mark when he rants about work.”He smiled and leaned against the wall, crossing his arms against his chest. “It got a little too Harvard for me in there.”I was genuinely surprised. “Are you a Columbia guy, then?”He laughed. “Nope. SUNY Albany.”My mouth dropped open. He gave me a teasing smirk. “Wow, you’re as snobby as the rest of them.””No! Not at all… I’m just surprised.”He walked a few steps and thumbed through one of Nick’s law books. “I have an influential father. It makes up for my alma mater in their eyes.”I sat in the desk chair and twirled around.”What about you? Wesley?”I stuck my tongue out.”Villanova?””Nope. Hunter College in the city. I come from humble beginnings, you could say. My dad’s a plumber.” I didn’t typically talk about that, though everyone knew it. I wanted to provoke Luke. Set him off his axis for some bizarre reason.He stuck his hands in his pockets. Something changed in his expression. “Now it’s my turn to be surprised. At the risk of sounding like a snob, how’d you end up with Mark? I thought it was a wife prerequisite to be a debutante.”I got up and circled around him. “It is, but we met at a college party. My charm won him over. His money won my heart.”He didn’t look like he believed me but he was too polite to press it. He smiled because he had to, since I was “obviously” k**ding. I didn’t like that he could read me so well.The real story was that Mark and I married because we had to. It was the oldest story in the world. I got pregnant and he came from a long line of men who “did the right thing”. We had a June wedding. In August I lost the baby. So clichéd, really, but it was the truth. He wouldn’t dare divorce me after; people would suspect the truth and there would be talk. And by then we were used to one another, for better or for worse.”You are kind of weird, you know.”Luke’s words jolted me out of my bad memories. “What?””In the brief time I’ve known you, you’ve admitted to kind of hating your life, you’ve told me your dad is a plumber and you’ve suggested you’re some social climber. I’m fascinated.”We joked for a while. I started noticing things–the way his hair fell against his forehead, his unnaturally long eyelashes, the strength in his forearms. A peculiar sense of attraction overwhelmed me. I hadn’t felt such a longing in quite a while. It knocked me off kilter.Luke suffered from the same discomfort. I realized he was ogling my cleavage. He took a few opportunities to lean down and whisper things close to my ear.”You must be k**ding. You don’t know how to ride a bike?!”I shook my head and smiled helplessly. “Nope.””That’s… unpatriotic.”A laugh bubbled from my chest. “Unpatriotic? Are you k**ding?”He bit his lip to keep from smiling. “It was the first word that came to mind. What I guess I meant was unnatural.””I had a weird c***dhood.”He smelled delicious–a mixture of cologne and man. I u*********sly bent towards him. He was a bizarre dichotomy. Half boy scout, half scrutinizing, clever man, he was as different from his partners as I was from the women. Obviously he was superior to the guys, whereas I was just…different. I couldn’t recall ever having a conversation with them that wasn’t superficial and not laced with innuendo.”Knock, knock.” Mark stood by the door. I’d forgotten myself and was too close to Luke. I took a giant step back. “Are you two hiding out?””Caught us,” I breathed.”I expected it of you, Lucy, but Luke? I’m shocked.” He came to me and put his arm around my waist. “What’s my wife chewing your ear off about?””The weather,” Luke joked.Mark offered him a slightly amused smile and then turned to look at me. “Lucy, mind giving us a minute? I need to talk to him about something we have to do Monday.” I nodded and he slapped my ass. “Run along now, dear. Man talk.”It was something he’d done a million times. James Bond would have been proud. I’d laughed every time, barely registering it. Tonight I was embarrassed. My cheeks turned red and I couldn’t look at Luke’s face. It was humiliating to be reminded of my place in front of someone who I’d… respected. Who might have respected me.I mumbled “sure” and hurried out. David lingered at the end of the hallway, not even bothering to hide his curiosity.”He’s a goody two-shoes, right? Thinks he’s above it all?”I shrugged one shoulder and took his glass of whiskey, chugging down the rest. “I liked him.””Oh, no.”I gave him a look. “What?””You like him, like him, don’t you?!””Are we in the fifth grade?”David grinned like a mischievous little boy. “You have a crush on him. Holy shit!””I absolutely do not.”David ignored him. “You totally like him!””I do not!” I repeated. “I mean, I like him in a general sort of way. I like you, too, by the way.””Sweetheart, it’s not the same and you know it. You can’t fuck me.”My eyes ran up and down his body. “I could sway you.”David cracked up. “I don’t doubt your allure. I’m just saying you might wanna simmer down with that. Don’t shit where your husband eats; fuck the pool boy instead.”_____________I didn’t see Luke for the rest of the night. Mark emerged from Nick’s study a little while later and went for our coats. We hustled out into the night.When we got closer to home, Mark finally began. “So, what did you think of Luke?”I tried to sound blasé. “He’s okay. I don’t know why all the girls are obsessed with him.””Bullshit,” Mark snorted. “I saw you looking at him. You were eye-fucking him.””I was not!””You think you’re better than all those girls,” Mark laughed. “You’re fantasizing, too.””Mark, give me a break. He’s attractive, no doubt, but as if I could even entertain the–“”No, no, I know you wouldn’t really have sex with him. It’s just entertaining to see you acknowledge for the briefest of moments you’re human.””Ouch.”He reached out and stroked my hair. “It’s said with love.”I made a sound of amusement but I tilted my head for more of his touch.When we got home we went straight upstairs where Mark roughly undressed me. He tore off his own clothes and pounced. In spite of his nonchalance, I knew he was irritated with me. In his eyes I flirted with his coworker. And I was in agreement that I flirted.He threw me on the bed and climbed over me, his hard cock lining up with my pussy. I was aroused; I loved this side of Mark. If I could have spoken, I’d have told him so and would have repeated his words to him; when he was like this–fierce, jealous, threatened, passionate–he reminded me he was human, too.His hand snaked its way into my panties and he snickered when he found me wet. Two fingers thrust inside me and I threw my head back.Mark fingered me for a while until I heard the sounds of his fingers shoving into me. He finally took them out and smeared their wetness over his cock. He jacked himself off for a few seconds, his hungry eyes watching my chest heave in and out.He bent his head and sucked in a nipple. I moaned and threaded my fingers into his hair. He pulled his mouth off and rubbed his cock against my pussy, teasing me.”Tell me the truth,” he panted. “Do you want him?””Who?” I asked, knowing perfecting well who he meant.He bit my bottom lip and then pulled back, his face twisted into a disapproving expression. “Don’t play with me, Lucy. Tell me if you wanted him.””No,” I said, “Just you.””Because I fuck you good.”I nodded. He entered me on a slick glide.”Because I own you.”I agreed because it was true. No matter how superior I thought I was to the other girls, I was just like escort batman them. I spent my days getting manicures, swimming in the pool and getting drunk on my patio.Mark pinched my clit and picked up his speed. I cried out as I came. He pumped into me until he also came in a rush of curses and cum.He rolled off and passed out next to me. As he snored, I let myself daydream.What would Luke’s future wife be like? Would he marry soon? Would he also lord over here, enjoying the power trip he got doing it?I reminded myself how pointless it was to fantasize, and eventually I dozed off._________I didn’t see Luke again until a month later. I was at Patricia’s house to sunbathe with her. It was a puzzle to me whenever she invited me over; she hated me the most, and hid it the least. But if she wanted to gossip about me, she needed material. So I’d be invited over, and if I tried to come up with an excuse she complained to Bruce, who harassed Mark, who in turn scolded me.I escaped her for a few minutes and stood alone in her kitchen, stuffing a croissant in my face. Bruce strolled in and Luke followed. They held papers in their hands and appeared to be arguing. When they saw me, they stopped short. Bruce grinned; Luke stared.”Luce! Good to see you, babe. I didn’t know you were coming over today.””Hi. I didn’t know you’d be here before 10pm.”He got close to me–too close–and patted my cheek. “Such a funny girl. Is the wife outside?””Yep. Speaking of which, I should go tell her to turn over. Nice to see you, guys.”Bruce reached for my arm. “Hang out here for a sec. I need to talk to her for a minute.”He strolled outside, leaving Luke and I staring at one another.He broke the silence first. “I didn’t expect to find you here.””Patricia’s pool is bigger.”Luke grinned and ran a hand through his hair, ruffling it. I watched the movement with fascination.”You remind me of my mother, you know.”My eyebrows rose. “What?”He broke out in laughter and shook his head. “Sorry, that didn’t come out right. Believe it or not it’s a compliment.””Is your mother a beautiful, intelligent, classy lady?””She was.” His smile turned soft. “She passed away last year, actually.””I’m sorry,” I murmured.”Don’t be. I was a mama’s boy, and she was the last of my family… I have a sister I don’t talk to, though. I don’t count her. She sucks.”I didn’t quite know what to say. In all the fantasies I had of running into Luke, having a heartfelt talk was the farthest thing from the mind. I didn’t do emotions well, and I was awkward about death. Still I wanted to comfort him.”I understand. I haven’t seen my parents in at least a year. They aren’t dead but we’re not close.”A sympathetic noise came from his throat. “They didn’t even teach you to ride a bike.”I let out a surprised laugh. “Exactly.””What about Mark’s parents?””Good God, please. Have you met them yet?””No,” he smiled. “I’ve heard stories, however.”I nodded. “Don’t worry. You’ll meet them soon enough.”I peered out the window and spotted Bruce talking to Patricia, gesticulating angrily. Luke followed my gaze.”What do you think he’s pissed about?”I snorted and shrugged, remembering belatedly that this was quite unladylike in front of Luke. “Who knows? Probably about her spending.”He laughed but then froze up. I could tell he wanted to say something. I brushed some croissant off my bikini and waited.After a few tense moments he worked up the courage. He took a deep breath and asked, “How did you really end up here? Not that your college party, love-at-first-sight tale wasn’t cute.”It was apropos of nothing, really, but I knew what he meant. I wondered distractedly if he’d heard a rumor. I didn’t bother playing stupid. “In this world?” He nodded. “Mark. Life. Choices. It’s so strange how one choice, one mistake, can totally alter your world, you know?”His eyes reflexively jumped to my stomach and I knew that he heard something. He tried to play it off when he caught me looking but an uncomfortable weight settled between us.”I like my life, mostly,” I felt like I had to add. “As much as anyone does, I imagine. You’ll get used to it here.””I kinda hope I don’t.”His black eyes scanned my body and I fidgeted. For the first time in a long time, I was uncomfortable to have a man’s gaze sweep over my curves.His eyes zeroed in on my neck. He brought his hand towards me. I flinched and he smirked. “You have a ladybug on you.””Oh,” I said lamely.His fingers brushed against my skin as he plucked it from me. I jumped a little at his touch, and he stared at my lips. He cleared his throat and turned to release it outside, just in time for Bruce to catch up with him.”You ready?” he asked Luke.Luke nodded and gave me a wave. He’d swept any familiarity and warmth from his expression, which was a good thing; I noticed Bruce watching me carefully.Bruce waited a beat before coming over to me and lifting my hand, kissing the top of it. “Say hello to Mark for me, baby.”___________Two weeks later we were back at Nick and Denise’s house. As a cruel torment, I was seated next to Luke again. A strange electricity hummed between us.This time Mark sat across from us. He watched with shrewd eyes, cataloguing every inane comment Luke and I made to each other. I was exhausted by playing the disinterested wife. For the first time in a long time, I was grateful when Denise rounded up the girls to go into the kitchen.Patricia remarked that I was quiet tonight. I smiled and cracked a few jokes to ease the tension. They ignored me after a few minutes and I escaped to Nick’s office. I sat in his chair and swiveled round and round until I spotted Luke watching me by the doorway. I reached out a heel to stop my spinning and noticed his eyes follow the movement with a perverse sort of pleasure.”Hi, there,” I sighed.He came into the room and stopped a few inches away from me. He looked down at me in silence. In this domineering position, it was hard to banish the thought of me sucking his cock out of my head. Where the hell did that come from, I wondered. His eyes narrowed and I could have sworn for a moment that I saw lust in them. Could he have been imagining the same thing?”I wondered when I might see you again,” he finally said.”I can never avoid these things.”He backed up, sensing I wanted to stand. We walked over to the window seat and sat far too close to each other.”I wish I could, too, but it seems we’re doomed for life.”I pushed my hair back behind my ears. He smelled too good. I’d never felt such a raw, baseless attraction before. I’d liked how men looked in the past. I’d imagined them moving inside me. I pictured what their cocks looked like, or if they’d bother to make me come. But with Luke, I wanted to act on it. It was dumb and silly. We’d barely talked to each other. I knew nothing about him.Yet I just knew sex with him would be unlike anything I ever experienced before.He must have caught the vibe, or perhaps I wasn’t as good at schooling my feelings as I thought I was. Whatever the case, he leaned over and kissed me. It just happened; neither of us had a chance to hesitate. At first I stiffened up and told myself I needed to push him off. Maybe I should slap him, too, and scare him out of ever trying it again. A part of me felt nervous, like I was some shy virgin again. It had been years since I kissed a man other than my husband.Then I relaxed into it. His soft lips pressed against my own. His tongue moved in and out in long, wet slides that made me shiver. I exploded into flames. I wanted to touch him. I wanted to take his hand and press it between my thighs.Sense returned to him and he moved back, jumping off the seat. I reluctantly opened my eyes, feeling as though I’d just been jarred from a wonderful dream.He stood with his back facing me. After a few minutes, he took a noticeable breath and dropped his head back to stare at the ceiling. I could barely move. My panties were soaked, my nipples were hard and my lips were numb. I got up and touched his shoulder. He shuddered and stepped away, shaking his head.”That was a bad idea.”I exhaled in a whoosh. “Yeah.””I want to do it again.””Me, too.”He looked at me out of the corner of his eye. “Aren’t you supposed to be smacking me? Protesting your faithfulness to your husband?””Yeah. I’m supposed to be doing a lot of things right now.””Can we pretend this never happened?” he asked.I thought about it for a second. I recalled the sensation of his lips, the taste of his mouth. The little groan he let out when I kissed him back. Then I envisioned our future of dinner parties and charity events, of having to ignore one another and the connection that seemed to be growing between us.”Nope.””Shit,” he grunted. “This is ridiculous! We barely know each other! But I look at you and I just want to… Fuck!” He stalked back over to me and kissed me again. This time he released all of his frustration and brutality into our kiss. His hand touched my thigh and traveled upwards, pulling up my dress. I thought he might go further, but he regained control of himself. When he pulled away, he stared at my swollen lips. “Shit, shit, shit. You look like you’ve been kissing someone.”I ran my tongue over them and felt them pulsate with heat, felt the impressions of his teeth. “Okay.” I was uncharacteristically speechless. I’d had sex with a few men before Mark, and I’d kissed my fair share of boys, but it was never like this. Not even with Mark.Fuck! Mark! He would know instantly what happened. I shook my head and added, “That’s not good.””I’ve got to get back.” Luke walked away from me awkwardly, and I couldn’t find the words to stop him._____The rest of the night passed quietly. Luke studiously avoided me, and I forced myself to ignore him. It was a futile effort. My mind would inevitably go back to our kisses and I’d flush.No one noticed my raw lips, or if they did, they didn’t mention it.Mark pulled me out of there later than usual. He talked a lot on our drive back home, but I didn’t listen to a word of it. He must’ve realized I was someplace else when he parked the car in our driveway. As I turned to the car door, he grabbed my other wrist and tugged me closer to him. The gear shift pressed into the left side of my ribs.”What’s with you?””Nothing,” I said too quickly.Mark yanked the bottom of my dress up and pressed his hand against my back. “Get on top of me.”I knew where this was headed. “Not in the car. It’s messy and uncomfortable and–“”Get on top of me, Lucy.”I complied. He was so hard and he didn’t bother with foreplay; he sank into me and I moved against him wantonly, having been ready all night.We fucked each other hard, each frantic for the other’s orgasm.We didn’t speak much when we were finished, but I sensed his eyes on me. When we were in our bathroom and I brushed my teeth, he rested against my back and stared at my reflection.”Are you sure nothing is going on?”I spit. “Positive.”He palmed my ass. “I know you spent some alone time with Luke. Were you a good girl?”I faced him and kissed him long and deep. When we were both panting, I answered him. “The best.”__________I saw him again. This time I purposefully waited around the office after surprising Mark for lunch. I was just about to give up when I saw him walking in the building with some girl I didn’t recognize. My heart skipped a beat and I struggled to take in a breath.As if he sensed me watching him, his eyes lifted and widened when he spotted me. He said something batman escort bayan to the girl, who then looked over at me. She nodded and said something, then disappeared down the hallway leading to the elevators.He got close to me and then looked over his shoulder. When he turned back to face me, he looked as impassive and emotionless as the first time I met him. “What’s up?””I wanted to see you.”He exhaled sharply. “Lucy. This can’t happen.””It’s already begun, I think. We’re doomed, remember?”His eyes dropped to my lips. “It’s not going to work. I can’t fuck another man’s wife, let alone a guy I see every day. Who I have meetings with. I just can’t.””I’ve never wanted someone like I want you.”He squeezed his eyes shut. “You’re the devil.””Do you know how wet I was last time?””Lucy.” His eyes popped open. “Stop.”He backed away from me and ran his hands through his hair. “Why are you doing this?””I have no idea,” I whispered. It was the truth. This would only end in disaster.”I have to get upstairs.”I grabbed his hand and brought it between my legs. He tried to pull himself out of my grasp, but not hard enough. His fingers pressed into my pussy.”I’m not wearing panties,” I confessed.As if I’d electrocuted him, he ripped his hand from me and stomped away. I didn’t follow._____I went shopping a few days later. I did serious damage on my credit card, but I needed retail therapy.At night I was tormented by the memory of Luke’s mouth. It was absurd and irrational, but it was quickly becoming an obsession.I thanked God that Mark was consumed by at case at work; he’d be up my ass, otherwise.When I got home I picked up the mail and brought it inside. I put away my purchases, fixed myself some tea and sifted through bills. I reached an envelope only addressed to me with no return address. Curious, I tore it open and pulled out the single sheet of paper.”You’re right. We’re doomed. The Hilton at 6. -L”I didn’t realize until the kettle went off that I was grinning so wide my cheeks hurt.______I didn’t have Luke’s cell number, and I didn’t want to approach the front desk. The less people saw of me, the less my cover would be blown. So I sat in my car and listened to the radio, hoping Luke would spot me here.I didn’t think of Mark, or my marriage, or the life we’d built together. It wouldn’t do me any good. And I’d decided to let myself enjoy this. We would get this out of our system and Mark would never know. We could face each other indifferently in the future.A big part of me knew this was all wrong, that I was convincing myself of the truth I wanted to believe rather than the plain truth itself.I’d left Mark a voicemail that I was going to a new yoga class. Would he believe me? Probably.Doubt started to creep in, however. I was about to shift the car into reverse and speed back home when someone knocked on my window. It had been raining so I couldn’t see 100% clearly, but I knew it was Luke.I pushed the door open and stood next to him beneath the drizzle. He stared at me and pushed some hair behind my ear.”Are you sure?”I kissed him in response.He’d already checked in so we went straight to the room. We kissed as he undressed me. Shockingly I had no nerves, but I could feel his fingers shaking when he unhooked my bra.”Luke,” I breathed.”Yes?” His voice was gritty. It turned me on.”Are you okay? We don’t have to do this.”A finger slipped into the waist of my panties and he stroked the sensitive skin of my lower stomach. “We don’t?”I swallowed a moan. “No. I know this is h-hard for you.”He pressed himself against me so I could feel how tangibly hard it was for him. “I made my decision, Lucy. Do we need condoms?”I shook my head. “The pill,” I said succinctly.I wondered if he’d insist on a condom anyway, but his gaze was on my body and he wasn’t really paying attention.The panties were pushed down to the floor. He sucked in a breath and lowered himself to his knees. His other hand skimmed through my pussy, catching on my entrance. He studied me so intently I blushed. His eyes flicked up to me as his tongue slipped from his mouth and lapped at my clit.Instantly I clutched his head and attempted to bring him closer to me. He pushed his fingers into me while he sucked my clit and made me impossibly wetter.”Should I do this until you come?” he whispered against my wet flesh. “Or should I make you suffer?””Please.”He looked back up at me. “Please, what?””Please make me come. I need it. I need…Please.””Greedy girl.” He increased the pace of his fingers and returned to licking me.I felt him panting and moaning. The sensations all fueled me and I exploded in an intense orgasm that sent shocks through my nerves. Indescribable pleasure swam into my foggy mind and everything felt heavy and sensitive. He stood up and nudged me towards the bed. Bonelessly I collapsed and watched him tear off his clothes. He watched me with single-minded focus until he could crawl on top of me. His wet cock ran up my thigh as he moved to position himself. His eyes finally returned to my face as he slid inside.We both moaned when he reached as far as he could go. His mouth find mine as he moved in deep, slow nudges. He was so hard and thick. The walls of my pussy contracted and released over and over. I could tell it was driving Luke mad, especially when he held my hips down to the bed with a little more force than necessary.There was a strange flow of emotion from him to me, and vice versa. He watched me watch him as his pace picked up slightly. God, it was as if I’d been parched all my life and I’d finally been offered the drink to quench all the years of thirst. It was so much more than fucking, but I was terrified to think about what that could mean so I just felt.I was soaked to the point that he moved easily in and out, his thickness incidentally rubbing against my clit. His chest moved sensually against my hard nipples, providing ample excitement there, as well. My mouth fell open when I felt like I could come again. He read my expression and slipped his hand down to flick my clit over and over. Tears came to my eyes and I shook my head back in forth in disbelief.It only took seconds for me to come around his cock, sucking him in with deep pulses. He went crazy then, seeking his own fulfillment. He pounded his cock into me until I cried out, positive I couldn’t take much more.Then he pushed into me once, twice, three times. On his forth deep surge I felt the flood of his cum filling me.When it was all said and done, he dropped on top of me. Our sweat melded us to one another. He kissed my nipple and I jumped, still feeling incredibly tingly.”Shit,” he cursed with something like alarm in his tone.”What?” I asked, entirely out of breath.”This isn’t going to be a one time deal. Is it?” His voice was quiet, slow.I felt amazing. Exhilarated. Truly alive, for the first time in a long, long time. What I thought was clarity before was murky and dull. This was sharp, bright.”No, it’s not.””Shit,” he said again. “This is so fucked up. I can’t deal with this, Lucy. I don’t do shit like this.””Me either.” Then I burst into tears and he gathered me closer, not saying a word.________________A few hours later I was sprawled against his chest, swirling my fingers around in mindless circles over his abs. We shared some more stories, though it was obvious we still barely knew one another. It also didn’t matter much at this point, though I craved more information. Call me a woman, but I wanted to know everything about him. At that moment, I wanted to know about the tattoo over his heart.”Ramona?” I asked, tracing the letters in the literal heart he had drawn there.”Yeah.””I didn’t take you for the stereotypical heart-with-a-name-inside-it tat.” I tilted my head and analyzed his expression. “Did you love her?””Obviously. She was my fiancee, actually.””Really? How come you guys didn’t end up marrying?”He let out a breath and stared at some point just above my shoulder. “She died.”My heart thudded. “What?””Car accident a month after my mom died. I think stress contributed to her not paying attention and…” He shrugged.”Oh my God, Luke, I’m so sorry.”He kissed me and stroked my hair. When he pulled away, he mumbled “Thanks.””You’ve had a shitty year.”He nodded and ran his hands down my spine. I stretched and nearly purred at the feeling. “Then I met you, and this is going to cause me even worse karma.””Not what every girl wants to hear when she still has your cum inside her.”I felt his cock stiffen near my hip. “I’m sorry.””Are you?” I teased him by moving my body across his hardness. He hissed. “This says otherwise.””Why did you marry Mark?” he blurted out.I stopped writhing against him and stared. I couldn’t imagine why he thought it was a better idea to bring up my marriage. He watched me pause with a touch of sheepishness.”I can’t stop wondering. You two aren’t exactly the perfect fit.””Opposites attract,” I said flatly.He clutched my ass. “Don’t be cute.””You already know. I got pregnant,” I snapped. “Are you happy now?”He went back to stroking my spine. “I’m sorry.””We’re a disaster, you and I.”Luke ignored my comment. “Why did you stay married to him? After you lost it?”I laid my head down against his chest and went back to making invisible circles on his warm skin. “It might not make me the most altruistic person by admitting this, but it’s a comfy marriage. All my needs are taken care of. Mark is an okay husband.””And you’re satisfied being a housewife?””I believe the correct term is ‘homemaker’ now. And sure, why not?”I felt him shrug. “You just seem like you’d enjoy busting people’s balls in boardrooms or whatever. I just got the impression you were bored.”I was bored. Dreadfully so, in fact.”Was the miscarriage bad?” he asked softly.I was irritated that this was his version of pillow talk. “Yes.””I’m sorry.”I blew out a breath and shifted so that I could see him. “It’s gotten better with time. I can’t imagine having a k** right now. I can’t even think about what it would have been like then. Maybe it was nature’s way of doing us all a favor.””Do you regret it? Marrying Mark?”I clasped my hands together and rested my chin on them, studying Luke’s blank face. “Do you regret fucking me?”He shut up and I kissed his tattoo, then I kissed his stomach. My kisses trailed down to his cock, which was hardening again. My mouth sucked him in. I brought him as far as I could down my throat. I gagged against the head and he grunted.I ran my tongue over him and bobbed my head up and down until he came down my throat._________An hour later I was frantically zipping up my clothes. We’d dozed off after our last round and it was nearing 11pm. I had nearly a dozen missed calls from Mark, and two irate voicemails.Luke lay naked in the bed, watching me flit through the hotel room. “I’m keeping the room for another day.”I slipped on my heels.He sighed. “Come back tomorrow.””You have work tomorrow,” I said. I put my earrings back on.”I’m taking off.”I glanced at my reflection in the mirror and smoothed down my hair. “Do you think that’s a good idea?””I don’t give a shit.”I looked back at him and my heartbeat raced. I wanted to crawl back into bed and sleep next to him, inhaling his scent. But you couldn’t always get what you wanted, and I had a pissed off husband back home. For a moment I fantasized about telling him what happened, but I pushed the wild impulse out of my mind. It certainly wouldn’t benefit Luke, either.”Will you come?” he asked.I went over and kissed him. Then I put my purse over my shoulder and headed out. Just before the door shut behind me, I tossed him a “yes” over my shoulder.If I was doomed, at least I had someone like Luke going down with me.
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